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Again I try organise something they never ever tell me anything until last minute inconviencing me again . They ask me to do stuff for them like take them to this place they don't tell me the address cause I'm a taxi and telling me the road name only is really helpful and don't tell me what time so I'm just chilling and then they're late because I didn't know what time I'm supposed to get them there . I give up I'm not helping anymore just doing my own thing now
I work for family friends and feel like I'm constantly under a microscope and it f***ing sucks. Whenever I get a comment from them it feels super backhanded like, "hey u we're doing this thing wrong but we're gonna try to be super casual about it but it also 100% ur fault has to change" I would rather them just f***ing say what they want.
I just tried to die tonight, but instead i pussyed out. I'm not really sure how to feel about that. I wrote the suicide note and everything, yet i couldnt bring myself to chug that bleach. I hate myself not just for being too much of a coward to die but also just kind of in general. It's because I'm a garbage person whos a burden on everyone they love.
It hurts. Love hurts. Never being in a relationship but why do I feel this way. I feel a ache, a painful knife jabbing my heart every time I am reminded of you. I tried looking at others but I don't think I will ever get the feeling I did when I looked at you. Your eyes were enough to show me how kind and genuine you were. Every time I had a chance to talk to you my heart would race and I would clench up in nervousness. I never expressed it. Only two know of my feelings for y... read more
So I was told that my grandpa was sent home to die because the doctors couldn't do anything for him no more chemo no radiation so hes home and dying he cant walk so now he has to wear diapers I keep check in on him during during night cause his breathing when he sleeps scares me I don't know how long days months years I don't know and my great aunts come over and I know they are just trying to help but they keep reminding me that he's dying and it hurts even more every time h... read more
Because of a... let's just call it a *personal problem*..., along with my want to be with someone I'm currently not and also their goals, I'm going to have to try and juggle this *personal problem's* needs with infatuation for another person for multiple months if I ever want to truly be with them, and even then there's a high chance it won't work out. But honestly screw it. There's nothing else interesting happening in my life right now. From this point forward I think I'm g... read more